California "Water Cops" Fine Zuckerberg over "Ice Bucket Challenge"

Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg has been issued a $500 fine for his recent stunt, according to Palo Alto Police reports. Zuckerberg recently posted a video of himself pouring a bucket of ice over his head as part of the "Ice Bucket Challenge", in which challenged users must pour a bucket of ice water over their head or donate $100 to charity.

"In the midst of this terrible drought, we cannot have people wasting precious water," said a spokesmen for the California State Water Resources Control Board. "Mr. Zuckerberg has been fined because it was not his day to water his lawn."

The Challenge requires participants to get really cold

The water board has issued a statement to all California residents, urging them to not waste buckets full of ice water on frivolous stunts unless they wish to pay more to the state.

"I think it's dumb that the water board is going after people for pouring buckets of ice water on their head instead of going after the real problems. It sounds like they just need to chill out."

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The Cheapest Possible Housing in the San Francisco Bay Area

If you've ever tried to find a place to live in San Francisco, you might have noticed that it's incredibly expensive to find housing anywhere for a reasonable price. Due to the tech boom, the Bay Area now has one of the highest costs of living in the United States. Rent and housing prices have skyrocketed as tech worker salaries have increased and area cities have barred new housing developments.

As nearly impossible as it is to find a good place to live at a reasonable price in the city, we have found ways to find the absolute cheapest housing in San Francisco. These are the secrets that the greedy landlords do not want you to know.

The Mission District is one of the most popular places to live in San Francisco. But if you've tried looking for a suitable apartment, you might have noticed that they run in excess of $3000/month! That's a lot of coffee from the organic, free-trade, locally roasted coffee shop on the corner! What if there was a way to live in the Mission District without having to pay a dime in rent?

Meet the Rent Free SF movement. The movement, started by several college educated young adults, has established tent cities around the city. We took a visit to the tent city in the Mission District to ask how the living experience was.

"I love living here," said Adriana Macentyre. "I moved to SF about 2 weeks ago to start my new job as a barista at the coffee shop on Harrison Street. The wages are a lot higher here than San Leandro! I only needed to stop drinking coffee for 2 days to scrape together enough funds to buy my tent. I didn't want to have to commute as I don't have my drivers license and BART takes too long. Now I can afford to go to the same thrift shops my friends go to!"

"Tenderloin was an absolute mess," said Harold Newmeyer. "I had my shoes stolen the night I moved in. Now over here in the Mission District, that never happens (Harold was not wearing any shoes during this interview). Everyone here is so happy, it's almost like they are on drugs or something. Despite the occasional naked dude running around the place, I like it here better."

"I was paying half of the $5000 a month of the studio I was sharing with my 5 friends on Nob Hill," said Jillian Faller. "My dad stopped giving me money to live there so now we all live in the tents. He keeps telling me to get a job, but no one here appreciates my Art Deco Studies degree. But I got to say it's like we're camping every single day!"

Live free in San Francisco!
(Image Source: Jack Newton)

The group has not been without it's problems. Minor crime occurs within the tent cities, the most prolific being theft. Common items stolen include shoes, articles of clothing, gourd water bottles, and Macbook Pros. Several of the founders have left the tents as they "liked living homeless before it was cool." Mayor Lee has yet to make a statement on the group's existence, but landlords everywhere have been lobbying for the removal of the tents. The tents are expected to remain for a while though, as the locals seem to approve of their existence.

It's time to stop searching for the best deals on a deluxe studio. Stop bitchin and start pitchin! Live rent free today!

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Blue food coloring used to "Keep Tahoe Blue"

Documents seized in raids conducted by the FDA in the Lake Tahoe area have revealed numerous stockpiles of blue food dye being stored in the area. Investigators were called to the scene when residents noticed members of the environmental group "Keep Tahoe Blue" transporting barrels filled with a powdery blue substances to different warehouses around the lake.

Lake Tahoe has been the subject of many environmental debates, especially with the booming tourism industry. Many new buildings have been proposed to capitalize on the boom, but many companies trying to construct more buildings around the lake have been blocked by protest.

Investigators believe that many new casinos in development around the south part of the lake were allowed to be built due to secret agreements made with the environmental watchdog group. To mitigate the pollution and prevent protests created by construction activity, the casino offered the group kickbacks and blue food coloring. The dye is similar to that used to turn the Chicago River green for St. Patrick's Day festivities and believed to be food grade safe. Sources claim that the dye was still being tested had not been deployed yet. "Keep Tahoe Blue" board and staff members are currently under investigation.

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Clippers owner Donald Sterling offered new job

After being banned from the NBA due to racist remarks, Clippers owner Donald Sterling was given an offer by the United States government. If he chooses to sell the Clippers, government officials say that President Barack Obama will appoint him as of Director of ICE. ICE, short for United States Immigration and Customs Enforcement, has been under pressure in the past decade due to increased illegal immigration from the Mexican border.

Mr. Sterling may soon hold a government position
(Image Source: Forbes)

Despite his racist remarks toward blacks, Barack Obama says that Sterling is the perfect candidate for the job thanks to his real estate experience. "Sterling knows how to evict people. He can apply the same principle to illegal aliens."

Sterling made most of his money as a real estate mogul, owning several apartment complexes in LA county. Rumors say he once harassed and evicted an elderly black tenant. Several lawsuits have been brought against his "unfair" housing practices in the past.

It is unknown whether Sterling is interested in the cabinet position, but it is believed that the Senate would approve his appointment thanks to Obama's endorsement.

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